Day: Rejoicing and Rejection

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Today I got my new debit card – the last one was stolen because sometimes the world sucks – and had the kind of afternoon where you buy a smoothie and a macaron the size of your fist and then flip your hair and say Cause I EARNED this even though you haven’t done anything except survive a week and a half buying a little less than your consumerist spirit is used to. And then I had an interview for a job I really want. I’ve been thinking about how in order to successfully apply for a job and have any kind of good interview, you need to be in a mental place where you see yourself getting it. That’s the issue with rejection – anything you can be properly rejected from (a school, a job, a love) you’ve already spent hours thinking about, putting yourself inside the version of the future where you have it. And to handle rejection, you have to learn how to give up on that future. It isn’t so much that it hurts that they didn’t like you enough – though that does hurt – it is that you are forced to confront the possibility that future you that existed in those daydreams and hopes doesn’t exist. That you haven’t worked hard enough yet. And that isn’t always the case – sometimes you are there and this just wasn’t the time. But often, you were overshooting in some way. You weren’t ready, and they saw that. They saw that before you did.

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